Self care versus Selfishness

Somehow, most of my life I have believed in my heart, that if I thought about myself or took care of myself, especially before others, I was somehow a genuinely selfish person. I think growing up in a conservative Christian home contributed to this belief . It felt somehow "sinful" to ever think of me. I now realize there is a difference between being selfish and actually practising self care of one's person. Often times I have taken care of everyone else in the world and then given myself the leftovers, if there were any. When I raised my two children I laid down my life for them. I homeschooled, made sure they had the latest and greatest clothes and gadgets.  I did everything under the sun to make sure they were happy AND they still turned out weird, (just kidding of course), they are both wonderful. But in my attempt to make their world what I thought would be the "best" possible world, I sacrificed who I was. I derived my self worth from being "Trisha and TJ's mom". I believe I would have been a better mom to my children IF I had taken the time to practise self care and nourishment for myself also. Instead, I  raised them to be worried about the "theys" in their life's also. It is not SELFISH to take care of yourself, for when we become better people and more secure with our personhood we actually improve the life's of those around us. What may be selfish is to be LESS then you were meant to be. Why don't we ALL become the best version of ourselves and offer that to our family, friends and the world. We can make a difference in the life's of others and that is hardly selfish. When I take care of ME I no longer have the need to TRY so hard or have the need to please others. I am just ME and that person can change the world because she is unique, beautiful and -21.6 lbs healthier.